Top Three Disney Movies of All Time

‘When you wish upon a star, makes no difference who you aaaare!’ *closes eyes and wishes was in sparkly blue evening dress*.

Now, I know there’s a little bit of Nazi scandal surrounding Uncle Walt and yes I know that Disney women generally aspire to be nothing but subservient wives. I also know that talking animals in real life would be completely horrifying and how dear old Mickey is less frivolous mouse and more sinister Disney doppelganger, created as Wally’s shadowy other self (parts of Fantasia are truly frightening I think we’d all agree).  I KNOW all this. But the fact remains, that blue fairy was damn sparkly! Most of us learnt some valid American history from Pocahontas, and who doesn’t love an underwater calypso and a singing crab occasionally?? After much soul searching, I’ve decided on my top 3 Disney movies of all time (Old school Disney, not Pixar. Pixar = mind too blown by animation genius to think of top 3).
*Clears throat*

3^rd Place – Aladdin
‘PHENOMENAL COSMIC POWERS! Itty bitty living space’. I used to watch this every day before I went to school, which might explain why some of my Key Stage 1 education is a little mixed up and why I associate going to school with strolling through a bazaar and also with a fear of having my hand chopped off. Hmmmm. Princess Jasmine wasn’t a total drip, the magic carpet somehow managed to have sophisticated facial expressions without actually having a face (amazing) and Raja was the inspiration behind the name of just about every subsequent pet cat in the world. As ever with Disney, it was also laden with useful morals for the adults such as ‘wish fulfilment seems good at first, but never works out how you think’ and of course the old chestnut ‘don’t pretend to be someone you’re not’. Great songs, Robin Williams and a criminal parrot rolled into cartoon perfection. Top marks from me.

2^nd Place – The Lion King
This would probably be everyone else’s 1^st choice, but I’m bucking the trend. Disney’s answer to Hamlet is packed full of lines which are still stuck fast in the popular consciousness.  I challenge you to find anyone who won’t know what you're doing when you whisper loudly, ‘Muphasa!’ or shreik  out with glee, ‘He’s alive! He’s ALIVE!’ Lion King also contains the raunchiest Disney scene yet when Nala and Simba..errr...you know...and Elton starts playing ‘Can you Feel the Love Tonight’. Cover your eyes children! There’s also some proper tear jerking moments like when poor old Muphasa is stampeded over by a stampede *sniff*. We learnt all about the circle of life from this movie. We learnt that Hyenas can sometimes beat lions. And we all learnt our very first (and last probably) bit of Swahili. It means ‘no worries’. Brilliant.

1^st Place – The Little Mermaid
But finally, back when Nemo was just a little, orange twinkle in our eyes, we fell in love with the watery world of King Triton and his aquatic subjects. The adventures of Ariel  (another heroine that makes Snow White and Cinderella look like Stepford Wives), and her slippery pals meant that for ever more, little girls would wear their goggles under their hair instead of over and spend more time swimming near the filter at the bottom of the hotel  pool than is probably advisable. Ear infection anyone? Ariel is the devalued female, controlled by a domineering father but who strives to surface and live among humans, in particular the box- jawed Prince Eric. Phwoar. Ursula is one of Disney's most frightening villains ever, but boy does she belt out a good song! Likewise, Sebastian the crab is certainly the most musical crustacean that I personally have ever come across. He can throw together a 50 piece orchestra made of fish and seaweed in the merest flip of a fin! 100% pure Disney joy. But let’s not get carried away. Put down your maracas and take off your hula necklace just for a moment while we remember that The Little Mermaid also teaches us some important life lessons: that love conquers all, that you can overcome your circumstances if you try hard enough, that there is value in learning and in having curiosity and somewhat confusingly, that if you happen to make a dangerous bargain with a witch, it will pay off. Hmmm. Maybe don’t try this one at home kids. Overall though, YES Disney. Yes Yes Yes. Keep 'em coming.